Recognising and Mastering Ego

Our ego is our natural sense of self that places us in the centre of our own universe. Blindly following our ego is an easy trap to fall into. We become a prisoner, unaware of our self-induced captivity and how it separates us from harmonious relationships with others.

Recognising Ego

The first step to winning the battle against our ego is to recognizing ego driven thoughts and actions that we are often unaware of. It can be brought to our attention by feedback from those that have our welfare at heart or life events.

Here are some signs that you have an ego problem:

1. You are a poor listener. You are slow to hear, and quick to speak.
2. You get defensive when someone gives you feedback. This can take the form of over rationalising a situation. The tendency is to “forget” evidence and information which does not support your thinking and to “remember” evidence and information which does.
3. You want others to do things for you, but you hesitate to do things for others.
4. You do not try to understand or empathize with people who disagree with you. When you argue, your goal isn’t to understand and connect with people. Your goal is to prove you are right.
5. You mistakenly think that your opinion is the same as it being true.
6. When in a disagreement with another person you like to have the last say.
7. You would rather hear things you agree with, rather than hear things that challenge you.
8. Your first instinct is to criticize; your last instinct is to encourage.
9. You see life through a narrow lens, and everything fits in it. You are blind to things outside this lens. 

Starting to Master Ego

Controlling our ego doesn’t mean weakness or meekness. It means being humble about our strengths and honest about our weaknesses. It means letting people know our vulnerabilities and recognizing we are not always right. It means respectfully considering the perspectives and interests of others. It means seeking feedback and using it to get better. It means serving and supporting others, not just yourself.

 The fight against self-centred ego is not a trivial battle, but understanding our thoughts and actions that come from our ego and determination to change are two important steps. And once mastered be vigilant as it can try and creep back.

 More in Andy and Reena's new book Between Lives - Past-Life Regression, Near-Death Experiences, and the Evolution of Consciousness. Its full of self-help exercise to help readers on their journey to the New Consciousness.

Love to you all,
Reena Kumarasingham and Andy Tomlinson